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Jump-Off XXXXVIII
Friday, October 21st, 2005
There are only two classes in good society in England: the equestrian classes and the neurotic classes. ~ George Bernard Shaw
Democracy at work
Police arrested a 20-year-old gamekeeper for wearing a “Bollocks to Blair” T-shirt at a game fair recently. The Bollocks to Blair T-shirts are part of the Countryside Alliance's campaign to maintain their pro-hunting way of life. As they are surely part of the "equestrian classes" Jump-Off can only assume that George Bernard Shaw is outdated.
Show-Her-The-Post-Box
The Equestrian Association of Malaysia was one of fifteen NSA's that did not attend a SEA Games Meet-The-Press session organised recently by the Sports Ministry. Never received anything about it, say our sources at the EAM, who check their post daily.
Sports Minister Datuk Azalina Othman Said has said she will be issuing show cause letters to the errant National Sports Associations.
Perhaps the Minister could be reminded to meet-the-post-office.
The Tao of Polo
After insisting that he’ll play polo for Thailand in the 2007 SEA Games, Showjumper Extraordinaire Sunetr Burakasikorn was given the chance to exhibit his skills in an exhibition polo match at the Royal Selangor Horse Show.
Pi Tao played just one chukka, coming off the field with “legs like jelly.”
Despite his inability to hit the ball, Jump-Off believes he’ll still be better at polo than he is at jumping.
Chinese Protests
There’s nothing quite like the All-China Games for lodging appeals. Four years ago a dressage team from one of the provinces launched their appeal through the window of the judges’ cabin. It was sent in the form of chairs.
This year an Eventing team was eliminated when one of their riders warmed up over an unflagged obstacle. As it was the 2nd elimination of a team member, the team were eliminated totally. Their form of protest the next day was to stand in front of fence No 1 of the showjumping phase till for more than 30 minutes till the Police were called to remove them.
Thrilling the Crow
Jump-Off wonders what Craig gets
out of thrilling a crow. Or why it appears that pesky Russkie website
in TLOTB insists on calling Jeannette a crow.
Name that bum
Tattoos are really hip nowadays, and Jump-Off is ready the feature the best horsey tatts we can find. Please send only publishable photos of your best tatts to pete@equestrian.com.my
Let’s start with this one, found on the ample bum of an international trainer who was here for the recent South East Asian World Cup series.
You might make your guess based on the cellulite.
Gas Prices Drive Man to Commute by Horse
American Jim Jundt was so determined to rein in his spending on gasoline that he got out of bed early and rode his 14-year-old quarterhorse mare to work. Jundt lives 15 miles south of Minot and works as a mechanic at Goodyear Tire & Auto Service in the city. He said he and his co-workers had been talking about rising fuel prices, and he joked that he would ride his horse to work if gasoline ever hit $3 a gallon. His co-workers laughed, but when the price at the pump soared to $3.20 last week, Jundt headed for the barn. He said he was only five minutes late riding his mare, Patty, to work.
Punching Police Horses
Thanks to a new Florida law, a New York tourist is facing jail time after he reportedly punched two horses from Tampa Police's mounted patrol. Officials say Sean Curlin smacked the animals on their hind quarters in Ybor City. Under the new law, Curlin is more likely to pay a stiffer fine and serve jail time if he's convicted of harming a police animal.
Lucky they weren’t deputies, or he might have been shot!
Sick Training Methods
If you train a horse by giving it beer, tying it to your truck and dragging it through the woods, don't do it in front of your daughters as they will testify against you in court. In fact, don’t try it at all.
Go Lil Sista
A religious order of nuns, the Little Sisters of the Poor, are auctioning a donated race horse. The sisters will receive 20 percent of any future race winnings.
Jump-Off wonders if the racehorse becomes a champion prize-earner, will they change the name of their order to Little Sisters of the Rich?
The FEI has confirmed that it is indeed the South East Asian League and not Asian League.
Three Hong Kong riders earn points in the South East Asian League, riding as "extras".
Having reported that the Royal Selangor Horse Show would not have World Cup or Young Rider classes, Jump-Off is very happy to report that at the encouragement of Dato' Dr Jamaluddin Jarjis, President of the Equestrian Association of Malaysia, these classes were reinstated to the show.
Thanks
to everyone who has contributed to this (and previous) Jump-Offs. If
you have an interesting story that you think should be in Jump-Off,
please e-mail pete@equestrian.com.my
